Tips on dying hair lighter?

My hair is black..naturally really dark brown but have died it black and ive had it dark my whole life, except a few streaks or highlights when i was younger..but i really want a change and especially for the summer want to go lighter! i talked to my hair dresser and she said going lighter will ruin my hair becuase you have to bleach it, but i still want to go lighter im just unsure on what i should do exactly..i dont want to go blonde or too light brown i was thinking a chesnut or even darker brown with some subtle caramel highlights and lowlights, any tips suggestions?